People in comas like PB&J

I've been told I am in coma. I'm being serious. I'm diagnosed as being vegetative. Vegetative is not conscious. When I came out of a coma, I was still out of it. I was made vegetative. So my eyes are open but I don't know what's going on. I've been in a coma all these years and have never gotten better.

Swallowing is a criteria looked at. The test for this is a barium swallow. For me when I last had this test, some barium was mixed into applesauce. I did not swallow applesauce. If a barium lollipop existed the outcome might be different. (No one try to develop one. That just sounds gross.) After my test, I was approved for lollipops. That's improvement!

This is the stupidest thing I ever heard of, I am unconscious because I don't swallow. What's even more stupid are the countless times people have disagreed with me and have tried to show me my mental incompetence.

I'm going to go with it. I am vegetative and in a coma.

______________________

 My order from Lollies By Leah.

Peanut Butter & Jelly is in the middle.

Dear govt,

I like the Peanut Butter and Jelly lollipops from Lollies By Leah. Maybe all persons in coma should be given Peanut Butter and Jelly.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Ashley Moyer (@psnivy88) on Mar 4, 2019 at 1:08pm PST

Peanut Butter is on one side. 

Jelly is on the other side.
Video by Ashley Moyer.

_______________________

This is ludicrous! Do they even know what a coma is?

Why is it that vegetative was made an open-eye coma? The state must have some inkling of consciousness. It would be tiny; less than MCS, Minimally Conscious State. It's just a seed and my seed is growing faster. In another few years it will look even more stupid that I am still in coma.

It's sad, so sad (so sad)
It's a sad, sad situation
And it's getting more and more absurd