Opening My Eyes

Yes I remember when my eyes were shut. I don't have much, but I will share it.

AUDITORY AGNOSIA was mentioned in a video about PVS and MCS. I assumed that was hearing, but not understanding. I had that! I could hear in the coma, but I couldn't understand. It's easier to explain with music. I could follow a melody, but not the lyrics.

 Auditory Agnosia explains why I had such an extreme desire to open my eyes. Family and loved ones may have been telling me to open my eyes. I may have heard hospital staff around me and knew that if I didn't, then life-support would be withdrawn. (This is why my early medical records are the way they are. Doctors were making the case for brain death and removing life-support. http://thoughtfulveg.blogspot.com/2017/01/whats-so-special.html)

The thing that really got me was that I kept hearing a buzzer. It was behind me and to the left. This would play a big part and people would not know it. They only know now because I write about it.

I was sleeping good. I kept hearing a buzzer and I thought it was my alarm clock. I thought if I could just reach up and turn it off. I wasn't confused as to why I heard it in a different place. I should have been. My alarm clock was in this area years ago. Just like sleep will play tricks on you, so will a coma.

When I opened my eyes, I found out the area I had heard the buzzer was where the ventilator was. I found out that the alarm kept sounding on a particular machine.

I opened my eyes just in time. Life-support was to be removed that day.

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I contend that my coma was during the time my eyes were closed. This time right now that my eyes are open is NOT a vegetative state. That's very clear because I write. Before writing and after my eyes were open was a false coma. Pseudo-coma is in the literature and goes with Locked-In Syndrome.

from the NORD website

I am using one finger to type. I do not have control of other muscles except for some vocal ones. I speak some. Mostly everything now moves. I just don't have control. Everything except one darn ankle. It's not looking as bad as it once was, but it's far from the rest of me.