Friday, June 28, 2013

Why I Shook My Head

It’s difficult to imagine a more nightmarish scenario—to be paralyzed in a hospital bed, unable to speak or communicate, presumed “decerebrated” and brain dead, limbless, blind, deaf, only able to move your head a few inches (which the doctors interpret as an involuntary reflex)...

I was in that "nightmarish scenario."

When I opened my eyes after the coma, I could not move (no arms or legs that worked). I could not talk. All I could do was open my eyes and watch.

Maybe a few days later, I could turn my head.

It had been explained to me that a blood clot in my head could not be removed. It hadn't burst, as these things usually do. It had leaked, causing a major brain bleed. I had been in a coma. Now that my eyes were open, I could partly see (my vision was limited). My vision was poor, but I could hear. I could hear I was a vegetable.

I turned my head from side to side as fast as I could. I shook my head. Doctors wanted me to keep my head still. I would dislodge that blood clot. It could finish what it started. Movement wasn't an involuntary reflex. It was purposeful. (This behavior didn't last long, and yes it was a behavior. It responded to a particular behavior medication I was familiar with as a Behavior Specialist. A reflex would need a different medication.)

Updated 8/7/2015


  1. You are a fraud. Prove you were in a vegetative state. No one in that kind of mental state of being can use a computer much less form coherent thought. You are nothing but a troll preying on the lesser intelligencia who gullibly believes in your crap.

    1. Before u speak, know the whole story. My doctor requested my status be changed, It wasn't n now the govt has a mess.


    3. To Barry M. -- I know Angela Ronson. She is not a fraud. Doctors and government need to change her diagnosis as she obviously is no longer in a vegetative state. You need to read the whole story before making judgment.
      Denise McCortney Holladay